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The Chester-Perry Co
The firm's Sick Bay  

For such a greedy grasping multi-millionaire industrialist as Sir Reginald to give his workers the luxury of an in-house medical facility suggests either that he was bamboozled into agreeing to it after a particularly heavy lunch at his club, or he doesn't know that it exists, or (and perhaps this is the most likely), that he supports it because it minimises the otherwise huge exposure that the C-P company might have to claims of industrial injury, stress and mental failings from every clerk and manager in the building

The sick bay is staffed by a nurse (and sometimes an assistant or two) but apparently no doctors This, in view of strip 4815 is surprising.
Strip 4815 was published in the Evening Standard in January 1977 and in Bristow vs. Chester-Perry. This scan is from the Melbourne Age February 1977

The nurse's function is to get the malingering, workshy idlers who comprise her clientele back to work as soon as possible. To achieve this they have a variety of methods:

  • Staff claiming to have "blown their minds" whilst working are encouraged to read out a wallchart with a helpful message, as in strip 3218
    Strip 3218 was published in the Evening Standard in July 1971
  • Staff claiming to have suddenly gone deaf, such as Mr Pope the firm's hypochondriac, are sent away with a flea in their ear
  • Anyone suffering from screeching or ringing noises in the head is given cotton wool for the ears and told to stay away from the Chester-Perry Glee Club
  • Anyone who has sampled one of Mr Gordon Blue's latest creations is rushed to intensive care
  • And if all else fails....
    Highslide JS
    Strip 184 was published on Frank Dickens website in January 2002

Reasons that people have for reporting sick also vary but here are a few

  • Buying clerks who are compulsive paper-clip twiddlers
  • Buying clerks who slip on newly polished floors, type out a warning notice and catch their thumbs in the typewriter
  • Buying clerks with chest pains caused by intercepting a paper clip flung at a pigeon by a colleague
  • Accounts staff who rashly try to pay out three weeks money at once when the factory closes for its summer break and who do their backs in
  • Staff with pain in the jaw or chipped teeth, perhaps associated with some of Mrs. Purdy's light as a feather rock cakes
  • A rougher than usual Board meeting, perhaps enhanced by over-eager application of Sir Reginald's baseball bat
  • Staff with bleeding noses, grazed knuckles and damaged knees caused by over-enthusiastic rehearsals of the Buying Department's annual nativity play
  • Buying clerks who, attempting to sharpen a pencil with their weight fully behind it, find they have put their backs out
  • Attempting to write all morning with a crossed nib - it is Mr Trusty the firm's malingerer who reports the corresponding shooting pains up the arm
  • Buying clerks suffering from hallucinations in which they believe they saw Bristow actually pick up a pen to do some work